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Fear of Grief

Mar 2, 2019

I went to a workshop called Grieving with The Work of Byron Katie. Powerful. Helpful. For me, it turns out it was incomplete. Maybe I missed a message?

I love The Work. You might need to click on that link for this next statement to make sense. A worksheet isn’t meant to end grief. Worksheets are a tool to walk with me to discover what grief has to teach me.

I really think some grief is so painful, we desperately try to reduce it and conquer it as quick as we can. I sure did when Hannah died. And I also leaned into my sorrow out of respect for both of us.

Why is emotional pain something we avoid? I guess that’s a stupid question. It hurts. Yet, pain persists when we resist. It remains. It lingers. It knocks at our conscious louder and louder. It simply refuses to go until we have turned and have a conversation with it.

It doesn’t matter if it’s new grief or from a loss decades ago. When it shows up, it wants to teach us something valuable, something Sacred.

Recently, another beautiful young soul ended her pain by ending her life.

In the coming days, those that love this beautiful young soul, those that love her family will come together to support each other in laying her body to rest.

No amount of faith, no amount of logic, removes the sorrow that accompanies this moment. If sorrow is present, then sorrow is required to pass through these moments until it’s not.

Peace will come soon enough.

This moment will transform my soul, all souls if allowed. It’s a sacred space not to be pushed aside out of fear.

Fear is what took her. Fear of the future. Fear of pain.

Pain is not the enemy. Our fear of it is.

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About the Author

I'm a mom who lost her precious 16-year-old daughter to suicide on June 19, 2014. I am a mom to two young men and a wife to my wonderful husband. We learn from tragedy to make each day better. That's resilience.

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